Banishing the blues with Freddie - watching the movie helped me to unshackle my perimenopause fears. Find out what works for you.

Banishing the blues with Freddie

As many of you in #perimenopause can surely attest, I have certainly had my share of #fatigue, feeling off-kilter and out of sorts lately; not my best moments really.

But with this in mind, today’s #podcast is devoted to what helps to lift the mood and add some creative sparkle during those moments when life seems a bit much: when #health struggles become more than just an annoyance and are actually in the realm of inducing #anxiety, when #finances are taking a dive, or #family issues seem to be getting slightly out of hand. In general, life just feels hard. And we all feel the #blues now and then; in fact anxiety and the like are on the rise.

Feeling blue

The #pandemic that struck us in 2020 left a trail of people diagnosed with #anxiety and #depression in its wake. A cursory reading of the news obliterates any notion of peace and goodwill around the globe, it emphatically reveals that all is not well with our world which seems to be spiralling out of control.

It has just been announced that the world population has surged to eight billion people and, as a collective, we are confronted with all kinds of global problems, as well as the usual interpersonal mishaps and sometimes misguided anger, you name it. With all this going on, it is fair to say that it is quite hard keeping it all together.

Last time, I shared my fears with regard to my eyesight. I remember an incident a while back when I felt quite depressed about it. Once again, I had to get new pair of spectacles and I was really worried about my deteriorating eyesight, the knock-on effect on my finances and medical aid benefits, as well as the possible ramifications it could have on my ability to do the work I loved.

Amid all the stress of that week in 2018, I had asked to meet with a friend as I had a creative idea I wanted to explore. The Freddie Mercury biopic, Bohemian Rhapsody, was all the rage and she heartily raved about it too. I decided to make the effort to go and see it, poor eyesight or the not.

Bohemian Rhapsody

The dimly lit theatre was mostly empty; I was in the doldrums and the atmosphere perfectly matched my mood. The ever-present tension in my body had me sitting stiffly in my chair: worries and fears taking their toll. I waited for the movie to start, not really knowing what to expect. About 20 minutes in, I felt myself craning my head forward, no, not because I could not see, but because of how utterly immersed I had become, how what was unfolding on the screen was piercing my soul.

Enigmatic frontman

A quirky #musician of note soon took centre stage and I was arrestingly reintroduced to one of the world’s most enigmatic band frontmen. His name: Freddie Mercury, who in all his magnetic splendour sauntered onto the screen and stole my #heart. I was immediately taken in by Rami Malek’s portrayal of Freddie – raw, unapologetic and passionate. It resonated with deep parts of my soul. My eyeballs were firmly fixed on him.

From the get go, the Oscar-winning portrayal of the man, formerly known as Farrokh Bulsara, born in the then British Protectorate  of Zanzibar, was sublime and struck the right note. The depiction of the early days especially, was poignant, instrumental to understanding his heart for family and his generosity to the ones he loved. It was a powerful rendition of what made Freddie Mercury so special. In almost every conceivable way, he was different to those around him in 1970s London – from ethnicity and distinctive features to religion and beyond.

A creative of note

The former British Airways baggage handler based at London’s Heathrow Airport who had graduated with a Diploma in Graphic Design attained at Ealing College of Art would proceed to become one of the most iconic music artists of our time. And it was no coincidence – he oozed confidence and creativity, with originality and passion to boot and definitely was not-your-average anything.

He was a beautiful juxtaposition – though known to be quite introverted actually, his stage persona was larger than life. Then there was that voice and the antics on stage …

His pulsating #energy was palpable – it seemed to reach out from the screen. I felt alive. The swarthy, long-haired phenomenon along with his bandmates had me completely smitten. I could feel my jaw muscles relax, fingers unclench and my cares start to melt away as I was drawn into the saga of his tumultuous life. When I had come in, I exemplified the insipid and was having a right downer. As the biopic progressed, my body posture changed.

Flamboyance

His flamboyant personality attracted me – the clothes, the character, the self-belief … Such a contrast to who I am as I see myself as quiet and reserved. Perhaps it is the reason it struck a chord and held me so spellbound. I experienced, as I am sure others did too, the sense of being unshackled, especially when I watched the man with the towering persona and disarming charisma mesmerise crowd.

When I saw him execute those dance moves – that prancing on stage that sparked such frenzy. He effortlessly appeared to engage with the audience and genuinely seemed to have fun with the fans.

The legendary quality ascribed to his vocal ability was mind-boggling and awe-inspiring and it continues to inspire new fans decades after his death. That day, his creative range was on full display as the movie proceeded to reveal the Queen lead #vocalist as a first-rate vsinger, songwriter, pianist and consummate performer.

He embodied the electric, somewhat eccentric and probably eclectic artist. Despite what people said, despite the odds, he pursued his #dreams. It is so powerful when someone is so confident of their skills or believes in their craft so much that they are willing to pursue it, especially in the face of adversity. I was completely hooked.

Live Aid

Then, of course, the obvious: the #music that propelled #Queen to fame; the perfect rendering of what went down that day at the Wembley Stadium in 1985 for the Live Aid concert so many years ago. I was so energised, music pulsated through my body, my creativity was reignited and boy, were my spirits lifted – for days at least.

Love for his craft and music as well as the hard work required to become a household name was undeniable. Magic happened where it all converged. Now I am aware that #Freddie had many excesses and was no angel. I am not condoning or condemning anything; it is not for me to do so.

What I am trying to say is that for that just over two hours, somebody truly unique had me captivated. I could sense what made him so endearing to his fans; ironically, it was the vulnerability that one sensed despite his fun-loving façade. Whatever you may think of him, I choose to highlight the creative brilliance of the man and the way that he impacted me one day in December. He personified the trailblazer and creative pioneer. He certainly did not blend in but was no wallflower either; bohemian in every way.

Inspired

There is something of the celestial in terms of what artists are able to inspire. Indeed, art has a way of moving the souls of men – and women – to deep recesses within that are sometimes rarely explored.

For me, Freddie was one of those who had a musical and creative gifting; a talented artist who gave so viscerally, yet who was so mindful in approach. It is no wonder that the audience lapped it up. They recognised something unique that transcended mere pageantry – they witnessed the ephemeral, it was as though magic was in the air for a fleeting moment and you had to grab hold of it. And in the movie theatre, I found myself wanting to bottle the moment as a keepsake.

Face it alone

Queen recently released a new song that they were able to compile from old recordings Freddie had made while alive called Face it alone. I suspect that he had endured great pain. Perhaps it is why he is so endearing and special – because you sense that beneath all the clothes, the bravado, the voice, the tours, etc. behind it all was a vulnerable human, like the rest of us on some level. Despite all the ups and downs, he has indelibly been inked into the annals of time and has managed to amass fans even posthumously.  

I believe that many of us are trying to live lives that matter. Perhaps we are not going to crank up the volume and have a concert for the ages, but we can be a source of help and inspiration to others in our own, unique way. What does that look like for you?

The movie was perhaps a reminder that on days when life becomes dreary, we may just need to add a little sparkle. That is what Freddie did for me that day – he transported me to a different, colourful, creative world. It was literally music to my ears – the stuff of movies isn’t it. Sometimes, all we need is some inspiration that life can be different, that it need not follow an overused script. Though fleeting, it helps us to square the shoulders and attack our problems with that little bit more vigour and oomph.

And life has a way of throwing you the proverbial lemons – but may I suggest that instead of simply making lemonade, perhaps we can add to our repertoire and use them to create delectable lemon puddings, biscuits, cakes or lemon meringues. It is such a gift to be able to use difficult times as a stepping stone instead of a stumbling block.

I am aware that at this stage in our lives, many of us may be fretting about ageing parents who, though a blessing, are also finding themselves with significant health challenges. Perhaps children in puberty are running amok and you ragged, or you find yourself feeling quite lonely as the family-home dynamic shifts: young, adult children leave home to embark on career paths of their own and empty nest syndrome becomes an unwanted reality. Some real lemons …

Support structures

In times like these, support structures are vital – people to depend upon, those who will listen without judgement and then love you enough to be there with you through it all. However, they are also there to show you the error of your ways if it is impeding your ability to resolve an issue. We all need support and help from the ones we rely on to walk with us through the toughest times in our lives. As a Christian, I run to God first and having people who understand my worldview and my commitment to Christ help me on the long and narrow and it certainly makes a difference in my life.

But some days, I simply feel the blues … Perhaps it had been preceded by a period of running around with very little time taken to evaluate where I am at. As an introvert, I have come to understand that if I do not do the things I need – like resting when I need to, exercising, being creative, or funnily enough being organised and making sure that the cleaning is done, etc., the blues setting in is inevitable.

When I get cranky, I need to write things down to get them out of my system. I have a ritual of doing that, especially over weekends when I have more time. It helps me to write things down unfiltered – to allow myself freedom without condemnation. It is writing in free flow: no worries about grammar, spelling, or anything related. I allow myself to voice those hurt feelings, vent my frustration or have a bad attitude and I don’t worry about whether I am being selfish or prideful. I just put it on the page. It helps somehow, and often I simply just write.

It helped me get some clarity this very week; I assure you that it works. And I can address the things that aren’t right in my life after having given myself the grace to be open with it in the first place. Not to allow the fear to grip me and cause me to deny what is really going on.

I wonder if you can relate. Sometimes, I can be too scared of admitting my failings even to myself; that I am genuinely angry with someone or that red-hot, vengeful feelings are threatening my heart. Nothing like I believe my nice self to be. However, with God in the centre, friends and tools to help me on the way, I can definitely overcome the struggles in my life.

I am grateful that my struggles are minor, kudos to those who have to overcome chronic pain or a nagging health issues that cannot be resolved or those with permanent life situations that cannot be avoided. We salute those who soldier on through their trials and it is clear that the help that they need is beyond the scope of this podcast. 

If, on the other hand, you have simply been feeling the blues, I hope that the podcast has been a temporary boon. As for Freddie, despite his mercurial nature and foibles, may his creativity continue to inspire others to tap into theirs for years to come as he did for me.

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